Best New Music: Zoink Donk! – Mongrel Mutt/Gabba-Dabba-Do

The bastardised love child of reclusive navelwave maestro […] and MC Pikachu, legendry hypeman for Amsterdam ‘tardcore outfit Skullfunkerzzz, Zoink Donk! are the pioneering visionaries behind lint-rave.  Who ever thought that you could mix ponedrone and whinging Brooklyn lyricisms with whistles, horns and glowstix? Fuck me gently with a chainsaw, I feel like the only cock in an all pussy gangbang right now.

Ripping off the Postal Service massively, Zoink Donk!’s twin players started a transatlantic back-and-forth of conjoined creativity, each writing exactly 32 bars of music at a time. The only proviso, it appears, was that each new segment had no similarities to the last. Records change tempo, key and production values with metronomic regularity – as hypnotic as it is cacophonic. The effect is like channel hopping between MTV stations, but with less cohesion. Where else could “My sneekers gleam the streets while smoke machines bleat like sheep,” meet “Raving crew…maxium…yeah…techno bass asylum,” with such tumultuous poetical abandon?

While […]’s distinctive technique of re-recording all music back to digital from vinyl he has pissed on (uri-wave anyone?), Pikachu just sticks a whopping 180bpm kick drum on everything and seemingly plays notes at random while shouting. When juxtaposed, the effect may cause nausea, seizures and, in extreme cases, even marital break ups.

Three thumbs up!

Reviewed by

Dr. Rhubarb Pistachio